Reverend In The House

by The Reverend Bob Parks

As we all know, the Reverends Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson have been anointed the arbiters of taste and decency in the media. Sharpton has destroyed the career of Don Imus and has threatened others who stray and violate the code of good taste in words and deeds.

I asked myself who am I to criticize these men? They are men of the cloth. They are assumed by the mainstream media to have the virtue and title to look over all of us and judge those who must be judged for the betterment of society, and young black female basketball players.

I also asked who am I to provide commentary on social, military, and political issues? I thought a common citizen could have a voice like anyone else, but apparently, the mainstream media only listens to Black Democrat politicians and the Black clergy, not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’ve just decided to even the playing field.

So I went online, paid $29.00 plus $5.00 for shipping and within a few days, I will officially hold the title "Reverend" and a certificate I can proudly mount on my living room wall.

"Illustrating absurdity by being absurd…."
– Rush Limbaugh

Now before some of you get all bent, rest assured I’m not going to cross the line into blasphemy. I’m not going to marry anyone… even though I can. I’m not going to baptize babies… even though I can. I won’t sermonize from the pulpit… even though I can.

But as a Reverend, I can criticize the words and motives of the Reverend Al Sharpton and the Reverend Jesse Jackson with a lot more credibility than as a private citizen. When they next attempt to boycott, and have fired, anyone for using stupid, and even vile, First Amendment protected speech, I can put the spotlight back on men who are morally in no position to judge anyone’s free speech.

Whatever works.

Bob Parks is a member/writer for the National Advisory Council of Project 21, VP of Marketing and Media Relations/Staff Writer for the New Media Alliance, and VP of the Massachusetts Republican Assembly

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